In the red corner, standing at over 3 inches with a quiff, 2.4 pounds soaking wet (but don’t get it wet or it won’t ever work again), a monolith of gaming discontinued in 2002 whose reach is still felt to this day, the Nintendo 64. In the blue corner, a light footed contender born of the digital age, having no discernible weight or height, but virtually all the stamina available to endure forever, the My Nintendo Store.

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