In 2007, Michael bay released the first of five live action Transformers movies. You thought your Dad was whiny the cartoon? He was arguably worse in the Bayformer movies. And he gets most of the screen time because CGI effects are expensive.
I was in the Bayformer movies, but I am super violent. I say, "I'll kill you" at least 10 times. I tear Decepticon faces in half. I blow holes in the heads of helpless Decepticons. I kill Megatron even though he saved my life. I lie to your Dad about leaving Earth and come right back. Psyche. I threaten to kill Grimlock unless he lets me ride him like a horse.
The movies will make billions of dollars despite ignoring the blueprint of our beloved characters, weakening Transformers so that they can be killed by humans, having humans take up 80% of a screentime, Transformer character designs that look like piles of scrap metal, no offense to the designers, and worst of all, having me Optimus Prime, kill humans.
During the first three movies, you couldn't complain about Bayformers. Fan mobs would say you were stuck in the past and call you a G1 boomer. G1 fans had to keep quiet and retreat to their mom's basements. We waited, wringing our hands for the precise moment to strike. Then finally the fourth and fifth movies were bargain bin straight-to-video disasters. And the G1 fans came out in full force. We gave Michael bay the toxic fandom touch of death. That felt good.
You know, they killed me again in the second movie, but I wish they kept me dead.
#transformers #transformersg1 #michaelbay #transformersmovie
