In the video filmed on our How to Coach with NLP course I explain how an often perfectly innocent remark from a parent (or anyone) to a child can show up later as a deep seated belief and how, as a coach, to start to challenge these beliefs.
Working with beliefs in coaching is a fundamental part of helping clients achieve positive change, the meta model, in the context of NLP is a linguistic tool designed to help identify and challenge beliefs that are communicated in the form of distortions, generalizations, and deletions.
NLP was co-created by Richard Bandler and John Grinder in the 1970s, aiming to study and model excellence in human behaviour and communication. Bandler and Grinder analysed successful therapists like Milton Erickson, Virginia Satir & Fritz Perls to understand the strategies behind their effectiveness.
In this process, they also drew inspiration from American Professor and political activist Noam Chomsky's work on transformational-generative grammar.
Chomsky proposed that language is not just a surface-level phenomenon but is governed by underlying deep structures. This concept led Bandler and Grinder to explore how people's perceptions and thought processes might shape their language, behaviour and beliefs. From this exploration they created The Meta Model, which remains one of the keystones of NLP. While the meta model is not an exact replication of Chomsky's theories, it borrows certain concepts and adapts them to the context of communication and personal change.
The Meta Model in Brief
Three of the most common meta model 'violations' are:
Deletions: When essential information is left out, leading to incomplete or unclear statements. For instance, someone might say, 'I always fail,' without specifying the context or the frequency of these failures.
Generalizations: When specific instances are turned into absolute statements. For example, someone might say, 'Nobody likes me,' after facing rejection in a particular situation.
Distortions: When language is used in a way that misrepresents reality or creates false beliefs. An example of this is the use of mind-reading, where a person assumes they know what others are thinking or feeling without evidence. For example 'He didn't call me, that means it's over'.
By challenging these violations, using carefully crafted questions, the meta model aims to help individuals recognize limiting beliefs, gain a clearer understanding of their experiences, and open up new possibilities for personal growth and change.
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