"The thing that I found for building relationships is that I have to give value first. I have to give, give, give before I ever ask for anything. One thing that I like to do, by the way, is occasionally I will pick people up at the airport. Nobody does that, who's crazy enough, just get an Uber, right? But I'll go to the airport, I'll pick somebody up.
The give, give, give idea is that even in hosting, I don't like when, when folks host at a bar or at a restaurant, cuz then we all pay our bills and that's not generous. I think you have to host your party in your home because it's so vulnerable and it's so generous to invite someone into your home that that very act is so vulnerable and similar.
In building these relationships, I look to, how can I give, give, give. To give to a person before I ever ask for anything, and so that would be my general advice. I'm happy to go on specifics, but that's generally how I think about and in hosting a party to build your network. Why this works is you give a ton of party invitations.
Remember, a party invite is like a little gift that you give to give somebody. You're saying, I like you, would you come to my home? Everyone wants to be invited. I've sent thousands of invites and not once has a mega millionaire ever said, stop inviting me to these free parties where you'll introduce me to interesting people."
-Nick Gray
Nick is the author of The 2-Hour Cocktail Party, a step-by-step handbook that teaches you how to build big relationships by hosting small gatherings. Over 75,000 people have watched his TEDx talk about why he hates most museums. He’s been featured in The New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, and New York Magazine called him a host of “culturally significant parties.”
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Contact Mapping is your doorway to making more meaningful connections and to make the most of every relationship. The foundation of Contact Mapping is the discipline of (1) recording a few important details from each interaction you have with another human, and (2) always setting a reminder for your next touch point. These two tiny actions will transform your ability to develop meaningful business and personal relationships. Connect with people more frequently and authentically because you are using follow-up reminders to make sure no relationship ever falls through the cracks.
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