Marc and Angel use The Work of Byron Katie and at one point when Marc talks about flipping a thought to its opposite, he's referring to the four questions and turn around that Katie teache. I do not agree with all of Byron Katie's work/teaching (and as always, we need to take what serves us and leave the rest.)

It feels critical to acknowledge that "The Work" and other ideas like it can be harmful when not used with great care and sensitivity (or with a social equity lens) - in particular when they place ownership or consequences for trauma, abuse, mental illness etc., on the shoulders of the person who walked through the horrible circumstance. Nor do I believe in manifesting or that we alone are responsible for where we're at in life, which allows people to shirk responsibility for unjust and oppressive systems or other pain which we do not ask for and can be one more way of retraumatizing, shaming, blaming victims of abuse.

Having said all that, in a dark season of life I was introduced to the book Loving What Is by Byron Katie, and it helped me practice surrender or the idea of radical acceptance for the truth of where I was at and the reality of my life. Radical acceptance doesn't mean we approve of what has happened, but that we do not deny the messy, very imperfect reality of what is. Growth, healing, accountability, advocating for ourselves, a sense of agency and resilience, and finding our way forward can come from this place.

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