Master Higgins could learn a thing or two from these skaters. Did you know that they are incredibly considerate to strangers and have their own organic garden? These bruised up athletes may not understand how gravity works, but they know that you can't skate on dirt. It's hard enough staying upright on concrete, but lawn, sand and pretty every other rough surface is a recipe for disaster.

Master Higgins seems unfazed by these graphic images of injured skaters. Here he is, half naked and alone, trying to escape his tropical prison in Hudson's Adventure Island for the Nintendo Entertainment System. He runs for his life, but he knows he'll need something faster if he's going to escape the birds, snakes, spiders and other island inhabitants. Good thing there's a skateboard in this egg.

Wait, wait, wait ... why is there a skateboard in an egg? What kind of animal lays eggs with skateboards in them? And even if evolution worked like that, what scenario would have to play out in order for there to be a giant bird laying eggs filled with skateboards on a tropical island where they would be absolutely no use to anybody? Somebody get Wonderboy in here, I think he'll be able to clear this up.

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