Kids seem so innocent and sweet until...

1.
My 4-year-old was having a bath, when I came to take her out she said,
"Mom, all my toys are dead. I held them under the water and now they are all dead."
then she whispered "Dead in the water..." over and over again.

2.
At the grocery store a young boy smiled and waved at me, when I smiled back he said,
"You should eat your friends for dinner. That's what we do."


3.
I said "Goodnight" to my little sister and she came over to my bed, seeing some scissors on my bedside table she said,
"You know, I could chop your head off with these... Goodnight."

4.
A camp counselor was supervising an activity called "Paint the counselor" when the 4-year-old who was painting her hair leaned into her ear and whispered, "I'm gonna peel off all your skin."


5.
Whilst waiting for my son to finish his piano lessons I took my daughter for a walk around the cemetery. In the middle of the graveyard, she suddenly stopped, pointed at a grave, and said, "This is where you're going to sleep... Forever."


6.
Watching TV with my little sister, she started to draw circles around my mouth with her finger and said,
"A man is going to shoot you. You're gonna die, you know... Soon..."


7.
Shortly after an ex of mine called Alex committed suicide I was watching a movie with my niece and she asked,
"Who's sitting next to you?"
I said there was no one there and she said,
"There's a tall man with red hair. He says his name is Alex. He says hi."


8.
My 4-year-old just suddenly turned and said to me, "I want to know what the inside of your head looks like."


9.
My Daughter had an imaginary friend called Jenna.
One day we were stopped at a traffic light next to the cemetery and my daughter said,
"Bye, Jenna". I asked her where Jenna was going and she pointed to the cemetery saying, "Home. She lives there."

10.
When my daughter was 4 or 5 she told us that she had once been married to a man named Brad Huffington. When we asked what happened to him she replied sadly, "He was lost at sea."

11.
I was telling my 8-year-old son how much I loved him and thanking him for being in my life, to which he said,
"I didn't choose this life. I couldn't control how it began. But I can control how it ends."

12.
My 5-year-old said, "I'll miss you when you're dead... In five days..."
2 days later I caught covid and was really sick, and then he asked me if I'd like a memorial bench when I died!

13.
After having my son I told my daughters, "You don't throw balls around the baby." and "You don't leave small toys out where he can reach them." to which my 3-year-old replied, "And you don't cut off babies' lips with a sharp knife."

14.
Sitting at the breakfast table my 4-year-old just randomly said, "I was on a mountain once and my mum and dad died and then I woke up in this house with you and mama."

15.
I'm a construction worker. One morning my 3-year-old son hugged me and whispered in my ear, "Don't go to work, you will die in a wall."

16.
"I'm so mad at you dad, I was going to destroy you!"
"Yeah, how so?"
"I was going to throw you in a volcano!"
"Why didn't you?"
"I don't know where a volcano is."
"So we good?"
"For now..."


17.
"Momma, you can't take a shower"
"Why not?"
"Because all your skin will come off""
"No it won't"
"Maybe not today..."

18.
My friend's 5-year-old daughter was brushing her doll's hair and singing this song,
"First I'm going to kill my brother, then mommy, then daddy, then I'm going to live in the woods with you."

19.
"Mommy, you're talking too loud. You'll wake up Abiyoyo."
"Who's Abiyoyo?"
"My friend."
"Where is Abiyoyo?"
"In the mountain. He's sleeping."
"Why do we have to be quiet?"
"He eats kids when they are too loud."

20.
When my son was born and my 3-year-old daughter saw him for the first time, she just stared at him.
After a while, she turned to me and said,
"Daddy... It's a monster! We should bury it."

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