Free Quiz: Are You A Quality Partner?
[ Ссылка ]
Subscribe to Happily Committed Here:
[ Ссылка ]
LINKS:
[ INFIDELITY VIDEO SEMINAR | How To Cope And Heal After Infidelity ]
[ Ссылка ]
[ ATTRACTION TOOLKIT | How To Maximize Your Attraction Power ]
[ Ссылка ]
[ INSECURITY TOOLKIT | How To Overcome Insecurities In Love ]
[ Ссылка ]
[ MOVING ON TOOLKIT | Help Moving On After Heartbreak ]
[ Ссылка ]
________
Being Stubborn In A Relationship | When Stubbornness Is The Main Problem In A Relationship
Being stubborn in a relationship. Welcome to Happily Committed. I am coach Adrian. Most of my clients complain about being in relationships with a stubborn partner or stubborn spouse and if you've been with your significant other for a long time you probably think that they're stubborn too. It's normal. After a while we tend to get caught up in our frame of reference, in our way of thinking and viewing the world. And it becomes harder and harder to relate and empathize with our significant other, to be able to put ourselves in our significant others shoes. So if you have been called stubborn by your significant other or if you think that you are committed to someone that is really stubborn, what can you do? How can you fix this and start to pull in the same direction and have a moment of breakthrough?
The question that I'm going to ask you today is the following: is it better to be right or is it better to be loved? And that is a question that you need to really reflect on because most of the time people that are right and insist on being right all the time tend to push their significant other away. Unity within your couple, in your relationship, is more important than being right. Ultimately what you want to do is to create a loving nurturing environment within your relationship. What I've told many of my clients over the years is stop focusing on winning every argument. That's not what this is about. What your relationship is about is about happiness. It's about building happiness together and that should be the goal whether you are the stubborn party or whether you are considering your significant other to be so stubborn that your relationship is in jeopardy.
The second tip that I have for you is that you need to focus on building connection in order to not let the tension overwhelm or stress the relationship. We tend to focus on the fights, on the bickering, and the arguments, and we zero in on our partners shortcomings instead of focusing on trying to rebuild moments, instead of focusing on trying to move forward and past whatever tension or hiccup or stubborn behavior is plaguing your relationship. I invite you to shift your focus. Instead of being focused on the stubborn behavior and actions taking place in your relationship, try to be the party that inspires positivity, try to focus on the good and to build a connection with your significant other.
All relationships are about understanding your significant others wants, needs, desire, unspoken needs. In all of our videos you will hear coach Natalie and I talk about the need to empathize and to relate to your significant other. Whether you're at fault or they are, whether you're the stubborn party or they are, if you are unable to see things from their frame of reference, it's going to be very difficult for you to rebuild a bridge, to rebuild a healthy connection. There are some things that you need to be able to let go and others that you should definitely stand your ground on. One of the primary coaching lessons that should come from this video, that you should learn, is how to differentiate your non negotiables, your core values, and the small stuff that you may be kind of getting stuck on. When you weren't committed to relationships after a while we tend to give a lot of importance to the small stuff but none of these things are non-negotiable core values.
That is the key, making sure that you break through stubborn behavior or your partner's resistance or your own resistance by working on building joint solutions or finding joint solutions to common problems. That is the key to experiencing breakthrough in your relationship with a stubborn spouse or partner. Sometimes you're going to need to learn to agree to disagree. You are both two individuals on your own journeys and also on a journey together. You need to be able to respect and appreciate each other for all that you are and that is something that is essential that I remind clients each and every day in coaching sessions.
The last piece of advice that I'm going to leave here with you is there are deeper issues that are not being addressed, sometimes one party can be stubborn on one specific issue because they built have built up resentment over another issue that has gone unaddressed. That can lead to toxicity and it can lead to separation.
