A playthrough of Ocean's 1992 license-based action game for the NES, Robocop 3.

After starring in one good NES game ([ Ссылка ]) and one thoroughly awful one ([ Ссылка ]), you might be wondering - did Alex Murphy get the send-off he deserved for his final appearance on Nintendo's 8-bit console?

And well, it fares about as well as the movie it was based on.

This time, instead of going with the same team that handled the trainwreck of a game that RoboCop 2 turned out to be, Ocean farmed development of RoboCop 3 out to Probe. Probe's track record was spotty - they were responsible for the Back to the Future III game that showed up on Sega's platforms - but they had at least proven that they were capable of producing decent a game with stuff like The Terminator and Mortal Kombat.

Unfortunately, RoboCop 3 on the NES was not one of their better efforts. The graphics are a huge step up from RoboCop 2's and Jeroen Tel's soundtrack is amazing (that title theme!), but a fancy presentation doesn't matter much when it's burdened with carrying such a poorly made game.

(That being said, the music really is fantastic. In case you want to hear the title theme in its entirety, I've included it at the end of the video. Jump to 14:22 to take a listen. And does the first stage tune remind anyone else of Battletoads?)

RoboCop doesn’t feel as slippery as he did in the second game, but the controls feel just as uncooperative. Most of the enemies fire as soon as they walk on-screen, so you have to duck out of the way as you return fire. The problem with this is that if you fire at an enemy while attempting to duck, RoboCop doesn’t drop like you'd expect. He slowly aims his gun at the ground and fires, leaving him wide open for attack as he wastes his shot. He also can't turn around while ducking, so when the game throws enemies at you from both sides, you're pretty much guaranteed to take several hits when you need to face the other way. The enemies' erratic fire patterns don't help much either - most of the hiding enemies will refuse to show themselves until you've helpfully lined yourself up to take a cheap hit.

Everything about it is infuriating.

The other big issue with RoboCop 3 is the utter lack of content. The four levels take just over ten minutes to finish, and here's the truly ridiculous part: once you get to the end of stage three, the game tells you that you now have to walk back. Stage four is just stage three in reverse, so there are only three unique stages, and they each last just a couple of minutes.

Remember how I mentioned that Probe made Back to the Future Part III? Yeah, RoboCop 3 is cut from very much the same cloth.

It makes me wonder, though. Was the game so poor because Probe didn't care? Or was it more that Ocean wanted it done as quickly and as cheaply as possible, quality be damned? I really don't know, but if I had to guess, I'd go with the latter.

Either way, like the movie, RoboCop 3 on the NES isn't worth your time or money. At least it stays true to the source material in that regard.

(Random afterthought: did anyone else notice how the creepy doll-looking kid sitting on RoboCop's shoulder on the title screen is holding an uzi?)
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No cheats were used during the recording of this video.

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