If your husband is watching porn you may feel hurt, angry, or betrayed. You may wonder how you can make him stop, and if there are things you can do to change this situation...

First of all, your husband’s struggle with this does NOT mean he doesn’t love you; it does NOT mean that you’re not good enough. It also doesn’t mean you can force him to stop- forcing him to stop doesn’t take the desire away. Something has to happen within your husband where he decides he doesn’t want to continue those behaviors.

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Therefore, it’s important to have an intentional conversation with him. Talk to your husband about what’s going on. Ask, “What’s the reason behind it?” Explain how his actions make you feel- “I don’t feel loved/desired,” or, “I feel like I am not good enough...” Whatever it may be, express how it makes you feel.

If he decides to share things with you, please do not attack him. Attacking your husband will only cause him to put up more defenses. Instead, align yourself as his ally. If you aren’t comfortable having these conversations with him, ask a trusted friend to help.

Lastly, remember to support and encourage your husband. Ask yourself, “How can I strengthen my marriage and support my husband in overcoming this?”

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