Develop your empathy skillset to be a more effective leader.
Empathy is not an inborn trait. It can be taught and learned.

Listen to Dr Helen Riess as we examine these aspects about empathy:
What is empathy and what is it not?
Why is empathy critical to effective communication?
How might we demonstrate true empathy over fake sympathy?
How to guard against empathy overload?
How can leaders apply empathy in building their teams?

Dr Helen Riess is an empathy researcher at Harvard Medical School and a clinical psychiatrist at Massachusetts General Hospital.

Dr Helen Riess is the author of the bestselling book, The Empathy Effect: Seven Neuroscience Keys for Transforming how We Live, Love work and connect across Differences.
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Dr Helen Riess is the CEO and Founder of Empthetics, a tech ed company that offers online and blended empathy and relationship skills training for healthcare, business and law enforcement.
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Listen to this episode (#73) of Your Intended Message podcast on:
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Topics of discussion:
00:00 Introduction
02:24 What is empathy and what is it not?
05:08 Receiving and sending empathy signals
05:42 Empathy vs compassion - what is the difference?
06:35 Empathy starts with emotional self awareness
08:13 Is empathy overload possible?
10:13 Can empathy be learned?
13:33 Our face is a roadmap of emotions
15:34 How leaders can use empathy in workplace?
20:00 Signs of empathy shortage in workplace
23:40 Empathetics programs
24:41 How leaders can show and convey empathy at work
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Excerpts from this conversation with Dr Helen Riess

So the first part is observing other people observing their emotions, their emotional state, and understanding. So in order to understand other people's emotion, I suppose we first need to understand our own.

Well, that's a very astute observation yours, because you know, just like your podcast, title, your intended message, we have to think about what is our intended message, right.

So in order to relate to somebody, we first have to make sure that we're not just, you know, emoting from whatever's bothering us that day.

You know, if I'm in a lot of traffic and get stuck on the highway, and then can't find parking, and I show up at work, I might be showing up quite disheveled and on relaxed based on my experience.

And then if I'm meeting you, in order to be open to your experience, I first have to settle myself. Right.

So self awareness and self management, are keys to our ability to empathize with others, because we can really only manage only so many people's intense emotions at once.

And if we're in the middle of our own, it's really hard to be open to maybe the emotional suffering or emotional concern of somebody else.
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Dr. Rees in wrapping up. If you could offer one, two or three helpful pieces of advice to to business leaders to better show and convey empathy in the workplace, what might be those pieces of advice?

I would categorise those three things into attitudes, skills and behaviours.

Having an attitude that you people in your organisation are your most valuable asset. You know, a lot of leaders think about getting stuff out of people, getting them to write the reports, getting them to call the clients, getting them to make sales.

People will give you so much back, if you have an attitude of how lucky you are to have them and to show appreciation.

The second is skills. What we talked about earlier today is how am I perceiving the emotions of others, not taking them on, but just in my opening my eyes to seeing these people as people, and noticing what their faces, what their posture is conveying their tone of voice.

And then the skills are managing ourselves. And as we said, the first step is self awareness. You know, make sure you're in a centred place, and have the skills to either check in with someone who's not doing well.

And if somebody is not performing, rather than having punishment, and punitive measures be your first stick. How about acknowledging it looks like things aren't going as well as they were before? Is something going on.

So use curiosity before judgement. That's a really important behavioural adaptation, let's say and make a point to check in with people, not just about how their work is going but how their lives are going.
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