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On Today's Episode:
Have you ever set out for a get together, family dinner, or a company meeting thinking, ‘I hope no one here likes me.’ Of course not! Though some of us have a harder time admitting to it, we all want to be liked. No one sets a goal to show at the next social event feeling awkward and unaccepted and not liked.
As social beings, our nature drives us toward being social, but our awkwardness drives us to feel (and sometimes live) like social outcasts. Vanessa Van Edwards, professional behavioral scientist and queen of the recovering awkward people, is no stranger to the show.
We’re bringing some of Vanessa’s best highlights with tips and tricks to help you put your social anxiety to rest, and walk into the next event feeling confident and capable. By following her strategies to up your likability and knowing how to unapologetically say no, you can become a recovering awkward person too.
Vanessa’s 3 Keys to Saying No:
Offer something nice to say
Do not offer a reason
Offer an alternative plan or idea (only if you want to, no obligation)
SHOW NOTES:
The Secret of Being Liked [0:08]
It’s Okay to Say No, This Is How [10:54]
Boost Confidence & Charisma [22:34]
Deal with Awkwardness [43:59]
Be More Likable Online [58:30]
QUOTES:
“You are in control of how many people like you because you like the most other people.” [2:57]
“Saying no is a skill. It’s a skill that as women as men, we have to hone that skill, and we have to get good at it.” [12:56]
“If you give a reason, it invites someone to question your reason.” [13:41]
“Most emotions fade quickly [...] but contempt sits and it festers.” [43:16]
“If you’re setting yourself up to be fake, it’s almost impossible for you to get into authentic, real, deep connecting discussions and relationships because you’ve primed yourself for it.” [50:45]
“I decided to put my awkwardness forward, [...] I don't want you to fake it til you make it. I want you to show up anxious and awkward and learn how to use it.” [57:07]
Follow Vanessa Van Edwards:
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