► ”Circus & Churches“ on Spotify/iTunes here: [ Ссылка ]
► Hear Kayla’s Story: [ Ссылка ]
► Help support my music: [ Ссылка ]
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Two months ago I was angry and started writing a song called “Circus & Churches.” This song was never intended to be released. It was solely intended for my own therapy. However, a few days after starting this song I had a pretty significant conversation with my friend Kayla about this song/concept and was shocked to find out that what I had been writing was very similar to her own story. So I finished the song and here we are.

Goodness.

I’m a Jesus follower but I get so frustrated with hypocrisy. I'm frustrated when “Christians” say but do different things. I probably despise it so much because I’ve made some pretty hypocritical moves in my life, been that guy who says one thing and does another. But man, when it comes to a situation like abuse in the church, I get overwhelmingly angry.

Thankfully I’ve been able to process the anger and writing this song has actually been extremely healing. It’s allowed me to have healthy conversation about this topic and actually look inwardly at my own heart. Truth is, we are all flawed.

I’m not sure this song will connect but thank you for allowing me to have a voice in this chaotic world. I’m grateful that you’re part of this family and I’m grateful to create content for you. Life is short, bring your secrets to the light. It’s the only way you’ll find true healing.

Thank you for watching this

Feel free to check out the conversation I had with Kayla about this song. Hear Kayla’s story, she’s a boss: [ Ссылка ]

Young girl actor: Mia
Woman actor: Maddy Newton ([ Ссылка ])
Video DP: Tyler Follon
Video Edit: Tyler Ward
Audio Production/Mixing: Tyler Ward


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Lyrics:

June 94’
That’s a story she ignores
They swept the pride and the lust
of a preacher they loved
Under the rug

And she wonders why...

She’s staring at herself in her underwear
Pulling her hair
Saying, “nobody cares”
She whispers, “It was an accident, but I’m a fu*king accident”
Rubbin' on her noes
Grabbin' on her thighs
Up another half size
She’d rather show up in the circus
Than show up in churches

So love your neighbor as yourself
But what if you don’t love yourself?
Well that explains our enemies
But where is all this coming from?
It must of been when I was young
Those words you spoke over me
Identity.

She stepped
Though the door
Down the hall
He made sure she didn’t say a word
He took off that red colored dress
My god she was so innocent
She remembers all the things that he whispered
He cut her down down like his zipper
You’ll never be worth it.
Far from perfect.
A daughter of the king, that’s bull sh*t
Now he’s touching on her noes
Grabbing on her things
And told her “big girls don’t cry”
She’d rather show up in the circus
Than show up in churchs

So love your neighbor as yourself
But what if you don’t love yourself?
Well that explains my enemies
But where is all this coming from?
It must of been when I was young
Those words you spoke over me
Identity.


So love your neighbor as yourself
SHOUT: What is there to love?
What if you don’t love yourself?
SHOUT: When you’re not enough!

Perspective. It’s all about perspective. You just never know what someone else has been through. So before we point fingers and before we judge, take a look in the mirror, take look in the mirror.
If that was your story, if those were your circumstance, that could be you! That could be you.
We are all flawed and we all need grace. Father forgive us for we know not what we doe all need grace. Father forgive us for we know not what we do


Tyler Ward - "Circus and Churches" (Official Music Video)

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