Anytime there is contempt in a relationship, that is never a good sign you are headed down the right path.
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Although it is difficult to heal contempt for your significant other, it is even more devastating to have that feeling in the first place.
In order to heal contempt, it is critical to learn how to understand, truly forgive, and move forward in the relationship.
Although the definition of contempt varies for each individual, it has to do with feeling that your significant other is not worth consideration.
It is when you feel anger or resentment towards your significant other, resulting in feeling a sense of worthlessness towards them.
Sometimes having a feeling of indifference is common as well, where you don't really care either way about their feelings.
In order to stop contempt in a relationship, you have to understand your significant other more.
You have to learn how to build empathy for your other half so the negative feelings subside, and you are able to have a relationship where you don't feel so hostile or numb towards the other person.
Here are 10 steps that will drastically reduce contempt in a relationship:
1. Find alternative perspectives; create other meanings
2. Don't over-think
3. Own your responsibility
4. Be curious and ask questions
5. Forgive; put things behind you
6. Give the benefit of the doubt; believe in good-intentions
7. Stop waiting and start doing
8. Expressing feelings without frustration
9. Identify positives in your relationship
10. Participate in marriage coaching to get a 3rd party perspective
Holding onto contempt will only result in the eventual destruction of your relationship.
Feeling contempt creates toxicity and negative feelings, which is not healthy for you, your partner, and your relationship.
In order to move forward, you must let go of past interactions and negativity. You must let go the negative meanings and associations you have ascribed to your significant other, and replace them with more positive ones.
This will eventually heal the contempt and create more empathy and understanding, which ultimately creates a happier and healthier relationship.
