okay look i get it, we aren’t a thing but you’re my friend. you’re supposed to be there for me. you said you would but you still go ahead and tell me to kms, you ignore my messages, those paragraphs from you MEANT NOTHING. i know they didn’t mean shit. i know you didn’t mean it when you said you loved me. i don’t know what i expected from someone who doesn’t like me as much as i used to you but i don’t know.. i guess i just wanted a friend. i want to stay friends. i don’t know if i could make it without you and i don’t know why. you could treat me like shit and i still wouldn’t be able to live without you. i hate myself for it. i hate being so dependent on people. i hate depending on people who only feel neutral. you make it so hard for me to like other people when you treat me how you do. i don’t know how people love people any more and it’s killing me- i don’t know what to do.
also please, and you know who you are, if you know me irl this isn’t necessarily directed towards you. anybody can and will be mentioned and i try my best not to point them out entirely. you know who you are and i promise this isn’t directed towards you. just trust me okay? i’ve got a lot more people who treat me certain ways and i don’t think i could manage to say anything about you due to not wanting to risk anything and the fact i don’t have anything to say. maybe some things but just minor idiotic things that are stupid. nothing big, nothing necessarily bad. just me being a pussy and being delicate. if you want to check and make sure it’s not you then you can go ahead and ask but i swear it’s not you-
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