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Feeling terrified to release this...hopefully it brings someone peace. I've faced a lot of demons the past year and can honestly say that acceptance and forgiveness (although very painful to walk though) has lead to a lot of peace & freedom. A new paradigm. It took me years to forgive myself for some of the addictions and mistakes I made...but here I am...moving forward and not staying chained to those spaces. This video is for me, and for those who are somewhere in-between...I want to look back and remember this season.

If you're looking for settledness in your soul, may I suggest looking into this idea of forgiveness?

Making eye contact with my brokenness: Learning to accept/love the parts of us we don’t like isn’t easy. In fact, it can often be overwhelming and downright miserable. Sometimes the only way to love these jagged edges is to take them out for dinner. Sit with them. Get to know them.

Have coffee with your failure. Eat a meal with that flaw. Hug your shame. Get to know it. Get honest with it. It’s there. And honestly, it’s not going away. So we may as well invite it in and ask what it wants to teach us.

What’s your story, envy? Where did you come from, lust? Why are we always at odds, jealousy? When we’re honest with our fragments, they often and magically loose their power and mystery. And who knows, by the end of the night we may actually become friends with these “faults” and recognize they were never faults at all...imagine, laughing and cracking jokes with our mistakes!?!

It’s one of the hardest things to do, but if we can make eye contact with our brokenness, it seems the other people in our world become much easier and enjoyable to love. Our judgement just kind of falls away…At least that’s what I’ve experienced. But what do I know?

I heard it once said, “get the log out of your eye before you help with the speck in your friends.” Maybe it’s time we take our logs out for some taters and mash.

#love #life #forgiveness

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Video shot by Tyler Follon.
Music produced by Tyler Ward


LYRICS:

Swore I’d never end up like this
Can’t see past my own mistakes
Broken promises turned into habits
I’ve gotta do something about this
I know, I know I need to start listening

Dear Self I’ve gotta write this letter to you
I’ll admit I messed up yeah a time or two
I finally get what I’m supposed to do
Let go

It’s not too late to start over again
Lesson learned from those things I did
And what I thought I could never forgive
That’s why I’m writing

Dear Self
I need you to know that I’m sorry
I need you to know
Dear Self
I need you to know that I’m sorry
I need you to know

Looking back on all this indecision
Finding answers in a bottle or two
Shouldn’t be alive but amazing grace
Sometimes we all could use a rescue

Guess a broken heart is what I needed
To remind me she would never fill the deepest part of my soul and I long for innocence, In a sense.

Honestly I’ll admit I’m afraid
Because love is the answer
And I’ve never let it in
I swore I’d never end up like this
Can’t see past my own mistakes

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