9's can space out and forget to do things -- don't take it too personally. They enjoy slowing things down with their partners and simply "hanging out".
The best way to connect with 9's is to approach them with calm and meet them at their level of peace. 9's bring big picture perspective to their partners, are great listeners, and engage them in looking at "the simple things in life". However, it's also important that we listen TO them as well and honor the times they do look into their personal wants, needs, and emotions.
Nines are incredibly passionate about fairness. They do their best to avoid "conflict" and are more likely to withdraw or be passive-aggressive when they are angry. If you see this behavior, try to connect with them and let them know that you are there for them. See if you can find something that feels fair for both of you and that their opinion matters. .
Nines may have a hard time setting boundaries, and instead build up internal resentment (unintentionally) toward their partners. As their loved one, it helps to set boundaries with them and encourage them to do the same. Nines can also need help with feeling supported and encouraged with getting out of their comfort zone.
Those in relationship with a nine, often feel valued and supported by their partner, but can struggle with wanting their partner to speak up for themselves. As peacemakers, they add a lot of calm and grounding to the naturally more amped up types of the enneagram.
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