I want to turn dirt into a clay ceramic sculpture. This dirt is from Colin Furze's famous tunnels! I want to sculpt the most British thing possible from my British land so I attempt to process wild clay and make a King's Guard figure. Can I make clay? Can I make that clay into art? Will it crumble when it dries? Will we even get to fire it? What do we name the grumpy guard?

Thanks to Andy Ward for all the friendly and cool help :)
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Thanks to Matt Gray for the review :)
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Thanks to Colin Furze for the dirt :)
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- Ali

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