𝖘𝖔𝖓𝖌 - die by myself- 𝖆𝖇𝖎 𝖓𝖞𝖝𝖝 🖤 x x

You might be alarmed and think this is about something that it isn't, but really it's about a conflict between not wanting to 'die alone' vs. not caring about that and living recklessly. 🌹

I say you should live how you want, and fear of any kind should never be a factor. Let me know what you think.

Inner turmoil,
Had enough and I'm,
Feeling worse for, feeling nothing ahh,
Might be kidding myself,
Sometimes I get sick of myself,
Inner turmoil, I-I've,
Had enough and I,
Say I do, but I feel nothing I,
Can't keep lyin' to myself,
Sometimes I wanna die by myself,

It doesn't scare me,
Dying alone, I am at home when nobody else is here,
With nobody round to get in the way of the way that I flow,
Prepare me,
For the drop if am not ready to go,
Ready to know what lies behind the line of everything that I've known,
But any way,
Would it be so bad to leave without companionship?
To man the ship alone and solo flow into that black abyss?
Or lack the bliss of slipping back into the cracks from which I lived,
Without a hand to hold,
A band to go around my cold, dead finger,
Picket fences prison gates, straightjacket wedding dress,
Stress, trapped within the parameters of a capitalistic mess,
Yes, I will give you my name,
Yes, I will give up my time,
Yes, I will give up my body to bear a body that isn't mine,
I'm split,
Forever,
between,
The heaven in my heart that wants to find the love of my life and stay together and the,
Beast,
Living,
Deep,
Within,
Me,
That feeds upon the energy felt in my irreverance,

Wish they'd stop hounding me,
With all this breakin' down on me like waves of biblical amplitude,
I can't be rude, I have to do the things that people plan to do,
My gratitude's extended to the family who have helped me,
To the fans and to the music, you are with me through it all,
Through the calls, through the falls, hear the chaos through the walls,
But still on a windy night I feel the dark ascend in me, the claws scrape to empty every last innocent thought,
Every fxck I have to give burns in the fire of my soul,
Til nothing's left,
I wasn't kiddin when I said that I am possessed,
I suffered the succubus to live and she sucked the sustenance from my breath,
But I kinda like it,
Without the demon there'd be nothin' left,
I wouldn't be spittin out hellfire,
Wouldn't be clinging you to my chest,
Yes, I will give you my body if you promise you will break it like it's bread,
And take it like it's meds,
Yes, I need to feel the dread to feel alive to feel the comfort of the night, Cause it reminds me who I am, I can't forget,
Yes, I plan to mantle Nyx, so that I'm big enough to escape the River Styx instead of drowning like a bxtch,
If, you think that you can intrigue both the hell and heaven in me then you'll be the one to win me,

Do not give yourself to them,
Primordial being lift your head,
You are not a soul to spend,
You are this whole existence.

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