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In this groundbreaking book -- the first popular book on narcissism in more than a decade -- clinical social worker and psychotherapist Sandy Hotchkiss shows you how to cope with controlling, egotistical people who are incapable of the fundamental give-and-take that sustains healthy relationships. Exploring how individuals come to have this shortcoming, why you get drawn into their perilous orbit, and what you can do to break free, Hotchkiss describes the "Seven Deadly Sins of Narcissism" and their origins. You will learn to recognize these hallmarks of unhealthy narcissism -- Shamelessness, Magical Thinking, Arrogance, Envy, Entitlement, Exploitation, Bad Boundaries -- and to understand the roles that parenting and culture play in their creation.
Whether the narcissist in question is a coworker, spouse, parent, or child, Why Is It Always About You? provides abundant practical advice for anyone struggling to break narcissism's insidious spread to the next generation, and for anyone who encounters narcissists in everyday life.
I originally picked up this book in order to gain insight into the personalities of an ex-friend or two. What I found as I read the book, was that I recognized several more "toxic" persons I had encountered throughout my life in these pages than I expected, including ex-friends, women I had encountered, one of my most vexing bosses, and a couple of key family members.
Hotchkiss' book is a highly useful and important analysis of the narcissists who one encounters in one's life. Hotchkiss gives you an insight into the narcissist's childhood development, and goes from there, through adolescence, into the workplace, marriage, etc. To deliver the info as succinctly as possible, she divides her analysis into seven main aspects, which she calls the "seven deadly sins of narcissism". The book gets mildly repetitive at times, but trust me, this is a minor quibble, considering the value of the information here.
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